It seems I owe a thank you and an apology to all.
I am sorry for everything I’ve done that has tread upon the
kindness, decency and patience of others. I know now that I’ve done a lot of
damage along the way and I need to start trying to make amends. The old metaphor of a bull in a china shop fits well. This
is worthy of a significant amount of contrition, as a point of recognition of
my own errant ways, and that is my intention here.
One of the constant drives
in my life is the pursuit of personal growth, and recent changes in my life
have made me step back and think about how I am, how I have treated people. I’ve
come to rediscover that I am, in all candor, at least occasionally, an asshole.
. and I owe an apology for that to the
universe and all souls contained therein.
Even though I am generally well intentioned, I realize that I am also ignorant,
impatient, intolerant, judgmental and a ranting fool. I’ve said and done things
that I wish I had not and damaged or outright destroyed relationships and occasionally
hurt people throughout my life.
I have
for many years converted mild depression into anger for survival and motivation,
which made me callous to other’s depression because it is a mindset I can no
longer empathize with, without falling
into it wholly. The chosen inability to
empathize makes me seem like I don’t care, but that is not the truth at all. But
I digress..
If I have tread heavily upon your kindness or good will, I
am truly sorry for that and for any negative repercussion to your state or well
being. We are all just travelers to this time and place, and I’m trying to move
on from the bad choices and bad behavior of my past. The saying goes, “you
cannot pour from an empty cup, take care of yourself first”.
Thank you all for the lessons, the kindness, the
forgiveness, the love, and the time to
read this
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